The Studio

It's been some time since I've posted. I've been meaning to get to it, but I've been purposefully busy these past few weeks. There's a proverb that goes: Idle hands are the devil's work. My dad used to tell me about a similar asian proverb that roughly translates to: An idle mind thinks evil thoughts. And so, I've been busying myself so as to not allow myself to think about potentially emotionally self-destructive thoughts.

One of the things I've realized since being single is that there when you're in a relationship, regardless of how wonderful or happy the relationship is, there are times when you forget to take care of yourself, the individual part of you. You take time away from doing things for yourself to nurture your relationship. The small sacrafices are not noteworthy at the time, they're completely logical and necessary trade-offs, but they can add up if neglected for too long. I suppose that being in a successful relationship includes finding a way to balance the me and the us, finding time to nurture both the relationship and to grow and develop as an individual, and to build in time to take care of yourself.

I may have gone over-board a bit, but I'm glad that I finally enrolled myself in that pottery class I've been wanting to take, and that I'm finally trying out rock-climbing after hearing so many great things about it, and my room! Have I told you about my room!?! It's fantastic, and I did it all by myself. I repainted the room to a warmer, cozier color, rearranged the furniture so that it looks larger, and bought some new furniture so that it looks nicer. I'm taking small steps to becoming the person I have wanted to be, and small steps towards living the life I have wanted to live, and doing the things I have wanted to do, and it only took a small heartbreak to push me in the right direction.

Lesson here, don't wait -- don't wait to do something fantastic for yourself, to do what you've been wanting to do. If you keep putting it off for too long, you'll wake up one morning and realize that you're not the person you want to be, you're not as happy as you can be, and you're not living the life that you could be. Regardless of whether you're in a relationship or if you're single, you're still ultimately responsible for your own happiness. If you're not ridiculously happy, change something because you deserve to be happy, and no one has the ability to give you that but yourself.

Here's the thing we started off friends It was cool but it was all pretend Yeah yeah Since you've been gone You dedicated you took the time Wasn't long till I called you mine Yeah Yeah Since you've been gone And all you'd ever hear me say Is how I pictured me with you That's all you'd ever hear me say But since you've been gone I can breathe for the first time Im so movin on Yeah yeah Thanks to you Now I get What I want Since you've been gone How can I put it? you put me on I even fell for that stupid love song Yeah yeah Since you've been gone How come I never hear you say I just wanna be with you I guess you never felt that way But since you've been gone I can breathe for the first time Im so movin on Yeah yeah Thanks to you Now I get I get what I want Since you've been gone You had your chance you blew it Out of sight, out of mind Shut your mouth I just can't take it Again and again and again and again Since you've been gone I can breathe for the first time Im so movin on Yeah yeah Thanks to you (thanks to you) Now I get I get what I want I can breathe for the first time Im so movin on Yeah yeah Thanks to you (thanks to you) Now I get (I get) You should know (you should know) That I get I get what I want Since you've been gone Since you've been gone Since you've been gone